Negativity Bias

Wonder why you wake up feeling negative some days?

Or wonder why some people seem stuck in negativity?

It is because we are hard wired for negativity.

Our brains have actually evolved to be more negative over time because the amount of things that feel threatening to our brain keep increasing as we age. By design, negativity can be a helpful quality - our brain’s job is to keep us safe and alive. It believes that if we remember everything that we do wrong, we are more likely to get it right next time. It is an internal feedback loop that says, “that is bad, so avoid it” or “you screwed that up, don’t do it again.” It can be helpful, but it is harsh. 

The bias of our brain to go negative was helpful in our caveman days. If I didn’t have an inner critic screaming in my head, “you are running too slow!!” I would have been eaten by a saber-toothed tiger. Survival of the fittest might be re-written as survival of the most negative.

Negativity can keep us safe. It can also keep us playing it too safe. 

Negativity isolates us and makes our world small.

We keep shutting out people and ideas until we are left alone with nothing. The fear center of our brain likes us alone with nothing to do because its job is solely to keep us safe. It counts that kind of existence of a job well done. For many of us, a negative, isolated, non-inspired mindset, leads to feelings of being depressed, sad, irritable, judgmental, angry, and low-energy. Safe from saber-toothed tigers, but really unhappy. 

We can manage our negativity bias but catching ourselves with it. Notice when you feel like a negative cloud is floating around with you everywhere you go. Notice when you think the world is a dumpster fire. Notice when you think everyone is wrong in their thinking. Notice when your energy is low and you are irritable.

We shift out of this negative bias by noticing it and deciding we don’t want to live like that.

When people come into my office and say, “I don’t like feeling angry all the time” I know they have a negative inner critic that we need to rein in. The voice of that critical inner roommate has become too loud and too harsh. Negativity erodes our self-worth and leaves us angry. After we decide that everything in the world is wrong, we also see everything about ourselves as wrong too. 

The world is a beautifully complicated place, and humans are beautifully complicated creatures. We can see the world and humans as beautiful or horrible. Negativity is fear. To combat negativity, we have to explore the fear underneath the surface. Address what you are really afraid of and then the negativity will diffuse.

Begin practicing this today and you will quickly see that you can control your brain when it goes negative. We will still have a hard-wired negativity bias, but can more easily shift into a hopeful state of mind. We train our brains like we train puppies to sit. Repetition. And treats. Repeat the shift out of negative thinking into hopeful thinking and the treats begin to flow to you.

Life can be big and glorious, you deserve to live unafraid. 

Try This

When you notice someone else being negative, wonder to yourself “what are they afraid of?” That will help train your brain that negativity is really fear.

Most humans are afraid of rejection, failure, judgement, being alone, losing power, or not mattering. These are valid fears, but unchecked they can feed our negativity bias. Notice this in other people. Then notice it in yourself.

Identify the deeper fear that is underneath the negativity. Bring it up to the surface and love yourself through it. Assure yourself that you don’t need to live in fear. You can push back the negativity.

You are a beloved human who deserves peace, joy, and love. 

Let’s live into it,