No Big Deal

One of my favorite meditation teachers is Pema Chodron. I have completed many hours of training with her through books, videos, and classes. Pema tells a story of a Tibetan guru who would say "no big deal" in response to hearing of his student's spiritual mountaintop experiences and in response to hearing of struggles to meditate. 

Guru, I saw God so clearly in my meditation today.
No big deal.
Guru, I can't get my thoughts to quiet when meditating.
No big deal.
Guru, tell me the secrets to enlightenment.
No big deal.
Guru, my mind is spinning.
No big deal. 

This is not a lack of compassion, the guru is teaching a practice to find inner peace. When we train our mind to react to circumstances with a calm presence on small things, then when we encounter larger challenges, we are better able to weather the storm without panic and anxiety. 

When I first heard this teaching, it resonated with me deeply. I realized I had a tendency to make a big deal out of small things. I learned this practice over a year ago, I have grown to love it...and realized most things are not a big deal. 

This practice is not meant to discount suffering, it is meant to remind us of the cliche 'don't sweat the small stuff' and when we train our brains to react to adversity with calm, then we are ready for anything life delivers. 

Try it this week, on things big and small, and see if you notice a less reactive way of living, a lower level of stress, and clearer thinking in moments of struggle.

No Big Deal

This practice helps you get in the habit of asking yourself: Am I making a bigger deal out of this than I need to? Am I adding to my stress level? Could I be more compassionate with myself in this moment?

When you face any adversity, respond with three simple words:
no big deal.

You don't wake to your alarm - no big deal.
Not receiving a party invitation - no big deal. 
Regret for overpaying for something - no big deal.
Long line at the checkout counter - no big deal. 
Eating an extra piece of cake - no big deal.
Watching a close scoring game in the final seconds - no big deal.
Spilling a beverage - no big deal.
Someone cuts in front of you - no big deal.
No cell phone charger available - no big deal.
Show up at the appointment a day early - no big deal.

After practicing this, you will notice that you find a solution to the problem faster by remaining calm about the circumstance. Often our anger, which makes it a big deal, complicates our thinking and more trouble ensues. 

There are obviously things in our lives that are very big deals.

This is not to minimize the weight of heavy things in our lives. But, this practice does help to remind our brains that we are capable of surviving this setback, we can figure out a solution, and have clarity in decision making.

Approaching this practice with self-compassion and openness will allow you to help yourself out of the situation. It reminds us that this is only a temporary discomfort. It reminds us that we are human having a human experience. And, it offers an invitation into a lighter sense of being.There are obviously things in our lives that are very big deals.

This is not to minimize the weight of heavy things in our lives. But, this practice does help to remind our brains that we are capable of surviving this setback, we can figure out a solution, and have clarity in decision making.

Approaching this practice with self-compassion and openness will allow you to help yourself out of the situation. It reminds us that this is only a temporary discomfort. It reminds us that we are human having a human experience. And, it offers an invitation into a lighter sense of being.

Sending you love,