Melting

The national events of this week may have you feeling confused, pondering, hurt, hopeful, or afraid. Today's practice is intended to help all of us soften our hearts toward compassion for all.

Pema Chodron, one of my favorite teachers of meditation, once used the metaphor of ice in her teaching to illustrate the opposite of compassion. This metaphor helped me realize that sometimes we can become solid and immovable in our thoughts and opinions. It is easy to become frozen, hard, and rigid in our opinions. If not careful, we lose the fluidity of listening-to-understand and opening our hearts to someone we disagree with.

I was reminded of Pema's teaching when an ice storm hit Kansas City on New Year's Day this year. I was sledding with my children when I noticed the ice on this tree.

As the freezing rain and snow continued for hours, the limbs of this tree were getting heavy. Some branches couldn't handle the weight of the ice and fell to the ground.

Ice is heavy. And sometimes it causes us to detach. 

Anger, bitterness, judgment, isolation, disappointment, fear, and sadness can feel like ice forming around our hearts. It becomes a heaviness we carry inside that hurts our relationships, energy, and living to our fullest potential. 

We can choose to melt our inner ice. It is a choice we get to make. Peace and freedom are found in warmth, openness, and compassion. 

Melting

This practice is inspired by the teachings of Pema Chodron on softening our hearts toward compassion.

Lately, I have been feeling icy toward ______________.

I feel this way because ___________________.

When I consider softening this hardness, I feel _______________.

When I am ready, I will see that we all have goodness inside. This will help me melt the ice and allow my heart to soften.

Now, imagine that the icy feeling inside you is melting slowly away. Eventually, the frozen cold feeling is replaced with warmth and compassion. You are welcoming fluidity again. Your mind and heart are open to other people and other ideas.

To close this practice, bring to mind someone you love dearly. Connect with the warmth you feel when you think of this person. You care about them, you wish to alleviate their pain, and you want what is best for them. This comes naturally to you. Treasure this feeling of warmth for a few moments.

Now, allow that warmth to melt any ice that remains.

The iciness you felt was temporary. Your nature is to be compassionate and warm. The ice helped you feel protected, but feeling cold inside isn't how you want to go through life. When this rigidity returns, connect to the compassion you have within to soften your heart and mind towards love for all.

Consider these words from Albert Schweitzer: 

"Constant kindness
can accomplish much.
As the sun makes ice melt,
kindness causes
misunderstanding,
mistrust,
and hostility
to evaporate."


Be gentle with yourselves and others, you are a loving soul.

Sending you love and gratitude,