Options

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Feeling trapped or stuck?

1. Remember that you have options. Often, if we feel trapped or stuck, we forget that we actually have options. There are always options.

2. Write those options down across the top of a piece of paper. I like to do this on the white-board in my office so my clients can visually see their options in front of them. Do this for yourself visually, with ample space under each one.

3. Consider the outcomes. In the space under each option, we are going to do an old-fashioned pros and cons list...but add a little twist of considering the option over the course of time. You can change pro/con into benefit/cost, easy/hard, etc. Here are suggested sections in considering each option:

  • Pros - short term

  • Pros - long term

  • Cons - short term

  • Cons - long term

4. Consider how it will feel. After you consider the outcomes of each option and evaluate both short-term and long-term impacts, then let yourself imagine how you will feel.

  • Immediately, I might feel...

  • Over time, I will likely feel...

5. Listen to your body. Some of us are more experienced at this part than others, but if it feels comfortable to you, then embodying a decision can be a helpful tool in finding clarity.

  • My gut says...

  • My heart says...

  • My mind says...

  • My soul says...

  • Consider other areas - lungs, liver, spine, muscle tension - Consult any part of you that feels like a sense of wisdom or deep knowing exists there

6. Name the fears. Complete this sentence for each option, "choosing this option feels scary/dangerous/risky because..."

7. Imagine the possibilities. Complete this sentence for each option, "choosing this option feels exciting/hopeful/fun because..."

8. Decide. Or not. This process helps you get the noise in your brain out of your head and onto paper. Sometimes that is all you need to feel better. You don't have to take action. You can let it bake for a while. Continue to add to the list as you think of more things.

And here is a secret - you get to decide if your decisions are good decisions or bad decisions. Really, it is true. Could what you are calling bad decisions actually have been good ones? Play with this idea. You learned from it, you grew, you discovered something new - it was a wake-up call, a painful reminder, a plot twist, a lesson in earth school. Remember we are student-ing in our lifetimes.

If you are truly trapped in a circumstance - you can write thoughts as your options. Our thinking about the circumstance is optional. Using a tool like this one, we can evaluate and choose our thoughts. What we think and tell ourselves about a situation is always within our control.

You always have options.

Sending you love and gratitude,
Ginger