Student-ing
/We are all learning about life, pandemics, and government powers right now. Earth School has certainly been interesting in 2020.
I first heard the idea of Earth School from Gary Zukav. He calls life, "Earth School" for our soul. He has a chapter on this idea in his book, Heart of the Soul.
Pandemic 101 is apparently a required course of Earth School that we didn't know we would have to take!
Times of uncertainty are reminders that we are all students of life. The experiences we are having are one-of-a-kind and no one has lived through a time such as this before.
This is all new. We are learning and growing.
When I get into times of deep self-doubt - wondering if I am intelligent, capable, loving, kind, and good enough - I write "student" on my hand to remind me that I am always learning and growing. Here is a picture of my hand yesterday. I wrote this as I was feeling self-doubt about starting a new writing project. Then I raised my hand up in a surrender to the sky and said, "God, you take it from here!" This reminds me that I am the student (not the teacher) and it helps me let go of my self-doubt (or at least lessen it a bit).
Author Elizabeth Gilbert wrote about writing "student" on her hand in a post on social media in 2015. She said she and her friend Rob Bell do this as their "best defense against self-abuse, shame, perfectionism, failure, and regret."
I was facing stage fright at the time I saw her post. This idea of Liz and Rob's felt liberating to me. Reminding myself that I am a "student" helped me deal with my stage fright. In a student mindset, I could drop the expectation of having it perfect from the start, and instead notice that I was getting better every time I was on stage. I would gently tell myself, "Of course you are nervous...doing it well matters to you...it doesn't have to be perfect today because you are still learning." This greatly helped my stage fright and it became a practice I continue to do today when self-doubt looms.
We are all students. We are a work in progress - as individuals and as a society. Humanity has never been here before. Our leaders are figuring it out as we go. We are individually figuring it out as we go. Answers are few. Everything is a theory and a best guess. Let's practice grace for ourselves and those making tough decisions. We are all making tough decisions.
Try this mindset practice to show yourself compassion and offer compassion to those leading us through these extraordinary times.
Student-ing
When you are afraid, frustrated, disappointed, lost, confused, or the many other emotions that feel uncomfortable, try asking yourself these questions and see if you notice a shift from "I have to have all of the answers" to "I'm learning; growth is part of the human experience; we all feel this way at times."
What can I learn from this experience?
What can I learn from this person?
What does a [culture, religion, political party, community, race, gender] different from my own, have to teach me?
How do I feel if I admit I do not know the answer?
Does it feel liberating to tell them that I have never done this before?
How does it feel to remind myself that I am still learning?
Can I release the need to do this perfectly?
Months ago, a client of mine shared a story with me of her young granddaughter staying at her house for the weekend. As the grandmother was having her morning coffee, the little girl came into the kitchen in her jammies, dragging her blankie, and said "Gramma, what are we going to do today? It hasn't ever been this day before!"
I loved her way of looking at the day. With awe and excitement. As a student seeing everything for the first time. It is all new to us. Every day.
Remind yourself and those you love that we are learning new things every day. Be gentle with expectations of yourself and others. We are all students. Student-ing is the practice of reminding ourselves of this.
Sending you love and peace,
