Loosening

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There is a German word used in dressage (fancy horse riding) that means to relax and trust, Losgelassenheit. You can hear it pronounced here.

Losgelassenheit describes the phenomenon of a horse relaxing and trusting a rider enough to perform a routine of fluid movement across an arena. Dressage riders train horses for years to be able to perform a dance across the arena. This style of riding is an Olympic event and beautiful to watch. Here is a fun video of dressage set to music.

I grew up riding horses. Not fancy dressage, but Western and English styles. I know this feeling of a horse trusting you and relaxing. You can feel their muscles loosen. They lower their heads, They flatten their necks. When relaxed, they aren't chomping at the bit or resisting the rider's guidance.

Horses can learn to trust and loosen. Human beings can too.

We have all spent a lot of time in tension this past year.

The word relax at its Latin root is re-lax or “loosen again.” Some of us are better than others at relaxing, but I think we could all use the reminder after 2020 to loosen again.

Here is a practice to get you thinking about this a little further. 

Loosening

Think of the last time you were truly relaxed.

What was the setting? Who were you with? How did you feel?

Close your eyes and see yourself loosening again like this.

How could you bring that feeling into every day? Are there any areas listed here that could use a little loosening in your life?

  • expectations of others

  • striving for perfection

  • the pressure to keep everyone happy

  • fear of making a mistake

  • concerns about money

  • criticizing ourselves

  • spiritual expectations

  • punishing self and others

  • seeking recognition

  • the need to be right

This week, experiment with releasing and loosening in one of these areas and see what you notice.

I once heard author Martha Beck say: “If we let go of expectations, would it all go to hell? Maybe. Who knows? Or our world might start to feel a bit more like heaven.”

I love that idea. Maybe if we all loosen our grip of control a bit, we begin to experience the bliss on earth that we imagine in heaven.

Allow it to be as it is. Loosen your grip. Flow with life. Be at ease.

Sending you love and gratitude,