One Notch Softer

I was giving a talk to a group of healthcare providers recently, and one man said, "I'm afraid I'm losing my compassionate heart that called me into this line of work. I feel I'm getting hard-hearted and angrier by the minute. I loved people, but I'm getting really sick of people right now."

I don't think he is alone in feeling this way. It has been a tough two years - especially on the frontlines of healthcare. This team feels overworked, underappreciated, and helping people in pain is a thankless job. Together, in this workshop, we were working on learning self-compassion tools and as one person put it, "how to keep from drowning." Many of the tools resonated with them, but the one they said the world needs to hear right now is this one...

One Notch Softer

What if you took that angry thought and just softened it down one notch?

Could you think about that person that irritates you and just soften one notch toward them?

When you are frustrated with someone in your family, what would it feel like to just soften your heart one notch?

This isn't a free pass to let their bad behavior off the hook or turn you into a doormat that people walk over. This practice is one about saving your own heart. The cortisol released when we are stressed and feeling "hard-hearted" isn't good for our own heart health. If we can practice softening one notch, we interrupt the cortisol release and save ourselves from the stress cycle caused by internal angst.

To my perfectionist friends - what if we softened one notch in our expectations of ourselves? Just consider what one notch softer would feel like. A little relief?

To my high productivity friends - what if you took it down a notch and allowed yourself a little break of rest or permission to do nothing?

To my easily frustrated friends - what if you softened the frustration just one notch? Free yourself of the frustration, it is actually a choice to become frustrated, we don't have to.

To my friends feeling like everything is doom and gloom right now - what if you softened the doom a notch? Maybe we aren't as doomed as we think we are.

And if you like the way this practice feels, then keep softening one notch more...and then another one...and one more.

The healthcare workers could feel love returning to their hearts. They could feel compassion for others returning bit by bit. They found what they needed to serve with love again and they vowed to do this practice often.

One notch softer. We can do it.

And if we all do it, maybe the world softens a bit along with us and then more love shows up.

Sending you love as we soften our hearts together,