...and that's okay.
/One of the readers of my Tuesday emails shared that through these weekly messages, she has become aware of how hard she is on herself and how impossibly high her expectations are of herself. She shared that in her 60’s, she is learning a “more gentle way to live,” and I loved hearing that. I’ve had to work hard to change my own brain from being uber-critical of myself to be more gentle and compassionate. That’s why I love sharing these tools with you, so that together we are all finding a more gentle way to live.
Here is another tool that helps with handling ourselves a little more gently as we go through our days. This one is permission-giving in the best way. When you feel unsure of yourself, see if you can add the phrase “and that’s okay” to your thoughts.
Here are some things I’ve heard from clients recently that work well with this tool:
I binged a series on Netflix this weekend and didn’t open my laptop to respond to emails…and that’s okay.
I don’t want to volunteer at my child’s school any longer…and that’s okay.
I stopped giving money to my religious org and started giving to a charity that I believe in…and that’s okay.
I want to take the job that has more meaning instead of the job with more money…and that’s okay.
My house is a disorganized mess right now…and that’s okay.
My neighbor came to my back door and saw me dancing in the kitchen…and that’s okay.
If you notice a shaming inner roommate in your head this week, see if you can override it with the phrase “and that’s okay.” This can lead to a powerful shift that reduces stress and helps you feel a dose of self-compassion.
Being human is a hard job, let yourself off the hook once in a while. The clinical research on compassion shows that when we let ourselves off the hook, we are more likely to go easier on others too - and that’s how we create a more loving world.
Be sure you do something you love doing today or give yourself a treat! And that’s okay!!
Sending you love and peace,
